My sister keeps criticizing everything I say and do! How do I deal with her?
Part I of II:
When you are bothered by her teasing you are creating more of it. Your reaction to her action is intense. This intense emotional reaction creates energy. Your focus (the intense reaction) is creating more of the same action of hers. Your reaction is literally fueling her next action. This is not necessarily a conscious action on her part, she is doing it as a result of your creation. By your reaction, the reaction that is very emotional intense, you are more or less forcing her to continue to do this. Your inner self, that is you, is helping her to keep doing this because of your reaction. You need to become aware of something, and your emotional reaction is a clear sign of this. In addition to this is the pure energetic creation that you are making with your reaction: your emotional reaction creates energetic attachment to her behavior. When you do not like what she is doing you focus on it, you focus on it in anger even when she is done annoying you, and you focus on it in negative anticipation before she does it. This focus creates an energetic attachment, a build up of energy that needs to be released, and so you create more of the same.
By controlling your reaction you can create less of this situation. By focusing on your thoughts and feelings around this event you can pave the way for a lesser emotional charge once it happens again. This lessening in energetic charge within you when it next occurs, will lessen the recreation of it. It will stick around until you can allow him to do it without you feeling much of any emotion. The way to lessen your attachment to it is to soothe yourself after each event. Realize that she is not the one controlling this, you are. She is doing it because of your manipulation. You are literally forcing her to do it so that you can fix your own issues. Once you can remove the emotional charge around this action, she will not do it as frequently any more, and you will notice less when she does it, because it doesn’t bring up any particular feeling in you.
You find it annoying because you see it as wrong. You believe she should not treat you this way. Why? Why do you have rules for how people can treat you? Because you do not treat yourself the way you want to be treated. You do not give yourself the same respect that you think you deserve. By refusing to give to yourself what you need and deserve, you are creating a reality that reflects this back to you, so that you can become aware of your self talk, and change it to more of what you prefer. When you can treat yourself the way you want to be treated, your reality will have to reflect this. Until you show yourself this love, the outside world cannot provide to you what you need.