The same skills that you learn moving through change, are the skills that make you good at change. And when you’re good at change you are good at progress. Progress is one step of change at a time, creating a huge transformation when added up.
What do you learn from change, and what does it take to be good at change?
Letting go of control/ not being in control.
When we are in control we are always going to recreate the past. Our minds are constantly trying to keep us safe, to keep us alive. We don’t distinguish between emotional safety and physical safety, which means we are always trying to avoid emotional pain. The best way to avoid pain is to stay within the confines of what you know to be more or less painfree – the safety of the known. What we have already lived we know we can survive because we lived it and survived.
When we are in control we therefore recreate the past as a means of being safe. But this is not usually what excites us or what we long for. We usually want something we don’t already have, which means we have to change. Problem is we tend to ask the outside to change instead, so that we can avoid the discomfort of being that change…
IF you want change, you will have to practice letting go of control, so that you can create something new! Meaning you have to be willing to change and not control how that process unfolds.
Embracing the unknown, because all change is about stepping away from what you know and into the potential of what you are creating.
As we let go of control we step into the potential. That which has not yet been manifested is right now existing as potential. Until it manifests it can become anything. It has the potential to become both polarities, red or blue, good or bad, high or low. YOU choose how it manifests through your beliefs and your perception.
If you have been manifesting blue and you now desire red, you have to let go of control and allow the potential to be un-manifested before you change your focus to red and through that choice of focus and belief it will form itself into red. In the moments between desire and receiving the matter is unknown to you. You have to accept this “unknown” and out of site in order for the process to work.
If you want to become a different version of yourself, maybe someone who has more money, you have to surrender to the unknown in the process of becoming. As you morph and change you are moving through the unknown, because who you are becoming in not yet known to you. Once you know it, it has manifested. If you don’t already BE it, it is unknown to you. When moving through change and being changed, you are in the constant process of moving from unknown to knowing and back to unknown again. Embrace it.
Change is scary because we are no longer in control, and it will trigger a feeling of being unsafe because everything that made us feel safe (conditions) is no longer the same. Learning to feel safe through change is a game changer!
When we outsource safety to our outside conditions we never truly feel safe. You can have all the money in the world and yet if you believe you need the circumstance to be just so in order to feel safe, you are constantly in a battle of trying to feel safe. You will be fighting to keep everything around you in check, to make sure that you are in control of it all.
But the feeling of safety is never fully present, because as long as you know you need to control something outside of yourself to be safe, you are always at risk of losing control. You can’t ever control anything outside of yourself. Most parents know this to be true…
The only way to anchor into safety is to create that safety within you. Feeling safe because you trust yourself and your own ability to weather any storm. When you feel safe because you TRUST that you are the creator of your life, and so you don’t need to control your outside reflection, your life levels up in excitement and fun! You are now safe to take risks, because you trust yourself to experience all of it and still be safe!
Embracing and enjoying challenges!
Change is growth, and for growth to happen you need to step out of your comfort zone and do something you don’t know how to do. You need to learn to enjoy the sensation of failure and not being good at something.
Risk is all about tolerating failure. Failure is basically just you not living up to your own expectations. Instead of avoiding risk in order to avoid failure, why not just change your expectations? What if you could see failure as simply a way of practice? Practicing something through repetition so that you can master it.
When you accept failure as a part of the game, and don’t let it mean anything about your value and worth as a person, you can move through trial and errors and LEARN from it! This adds experience and wisdom to your inner value, and at some point that inner value has to bloom into an outside manifested reflection.
Failure is just the ego resisting expansion, and you interpreting expansion as something negative. Expansion happens when you experience something new, something that challenges you to expand YOURSELF. If you can create a belief system that supports expansion through accepting failure as simply a tool for learning, then challenges and expansion turns into something you enjoy!
Accepting failure as a part of the process. You will fail. over and over again. The one who succeeds is the one who is okay with failure and just keeps getting up and trying again. If failure makes you feel defeated and like it’s impossible, then you will never get there.
Enjoying the growth gives you the stamina to try again which brings me to the next point:
You need to learn to guide yourself and support yourself through the change, which means you need to constantly be updating and changing your beliefs.
Supportive beliefs means a set of beliefs that encourage you to activate and explore your own inner potential. It means to believe that you are good enough no matter how many times you fail. To believe that it is possible for you to achieve any and all of your dreams and desires. It means to believe that you are worthy of having what you want, and the only thing that stands between you and those dreams is YOU.
You are the one in control of your beliefs, which means you are the one in control of what actions you take. If you believe it is impossible you will never even try. If you never try or take any kind of action then you will never have it or be it.
So the supportive mindset is the mindset that pushes and allows you to TRY, to go for your dreams over and over again. Until you succeed. And then you go for the next one.
This mindset is something you can change and adopt at any time. It takes some effort and practice, but it is the most valuable tool you can ever implement.
I can help you make changes in your mindset and in your life. You can absolutely do it on your own, but I am here if you want my guidance and support to make it easier and quicker. Your new life awaits you, but it’s up to you how and when you want to make those changes.