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safety

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This urge to control how others behave in your reality is a need for control. You believe others should be small and unobtrusive, because that is what you believe you need to be. It brings up fear when others are not following the rules you have agreed upon. Why can they be so large when you must be small? You feel like they are crushing you with their freedom and their power, because you feel safe only when others stay…

When others don’t follow the rules you have agreed upon, it makes you insecure. Rules make you feel safe. They give you an opportunity to feel accepted, and give you a measurable way of knowing if you are good enough, or not, and how good or how bad you are. When you don’t follow the rules you feel a lot of guilt, believing it makes you unworthy and unlovable. When others don’t follow the rules you believe they are also…

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